Drawn by: George Perez
Purchased originally: 7-11
Purchased again: Gotham City Comics and Coffee, Mesa AZ
In November 1981 if you happened to have sixty cents in your pocket, you could have picked this gem. And why wouldn't you? Look at that cover. Robotman from the Doom Patrol trashed and hung as a grim warning that "TRESPASSERS WILL BE EXECUTED!" It screams buy me kid there's good stuff in here. So you lay down your money and start to read. Only to get an opening featuring Wonder Girl.
Now look at this scene. Perez manages arrange the scene logically while maintaining a sense of dynamism. Yes, it's not clear whether those are supposed to by laser guns or real guns, but that's nit picking. This splash page screams action. Then you start to read and it goes downhill.
"Wonder Girl was looking for trouble, hoping for an outlet to vent her growing rage. And these, poor, pitiful fools were simply unfortunate to blunder in to her way..."
Now I may not be the sharpest of tacks but it seems to me these guys are in some sort of building and it's pretty tough to blunder a building into someones way. And then there's the dialogue.
"Momma! Put me down!" This is a classic example of what I like to call, how white people think black people talk.
But never mind, I'm nitpicking lets flip ahead a few pages and I'm sure we'll get to the Doom Patrol. Sadly my flipping is stopped when I spot the most hated man in comics, Terry Long.
Oh Terry don't ever stop being so inappropriate.
Donna fills Terry in on the Titans' latest run-in with Deathstroke and how Beast Boy is on Paradise Island to be healed by the Purple Ray.
Gar buddy one word- manscaping.
Meanwhile we get to see Starfire fighting Amazons and giving us some reader feeder as to her background. Remember at this time the character was only about a year old. Then the laboratory where Beast Boy is being healed explodes and we cut to.....
The other Titans are in a jungle searching for the Doom Patrol. Kid Flash does some high speed recon and returns being extremely cryptic.
Just answer the question Wally, sheesh.
Kid Flash leads the others to Robotman where we finally get the payoff from the cover.
Cyborg promptly repairs Robotman so that the story can move along.
Back on Paradise Island, the Amazons go on the Jurassic Park Ride. Whoops I mean they confront Beast Boy who has been driven crazy by the explosion.
Raven subdues Beast Boy and he promptly demonstrates his way with the ladies.
Those are the kind of lines women love. Also stare at their breasts, they like that too.
Back in the jungle the gang find a temple with a hidden entrance way and Kid Flash reminds everyone he's currently racked with doubt.
It's then revealed that Madame Rouge and General Zahl are behind the death of the Doom Patrol. Shortly thereafter the gang finds Mento and rescues him. But all is not as good as it seems.
Uh-oh.
What happens next?
Luckily I have issue 14 so we can find out next time.
Now for the letters page.
So how does this comic hold up after 31 years? I would say surprisingly well. Sure some of the dialogue is stilted. The internal monologues are strained but plot wise it's still a pretty good ride.
Special bonus: the back cover features a bitchin' Camaro.
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